Why women have affairs?
Chat about a loaded subject that no one wants to talk about, that’s it. Funny thing, extramarital affairs have been going on ever since ancient times. Extramarital relationships can be loaded with problems, cause sadness, and other problems. Also you should wrap your brain around all the other issues, there’s that truth and honesty thing, money, age difference, religious upbringing, shame, and on and on. I expect there will be some strong opinions about some of this.
For the purpose of this article I shall define an affair as a long term, maybe weeks long relationship of a sexual nature between two individuals of whom one or both are married to other persons, adult dating for merried.
Why do women have affairs? There are as many reasons as there are women seeking an affair. I suppose typically though it is only the human nature, the need for love, belonging, to be wanted and cared for, the caring for others and wanting to be loved and respected. Here are a few explanations I have run across.
Biologically we as human beings are all sexual beings. Nature has us set up to reproduce, to have sex. Sex is pleasurable and fun, and sex makes us get away the world for a short period of time. This excitement exists for whatever amount of time we are able to keep the adrenalin levels high enough. Some people can switch the desire on and off, some are good at controlling it and others are so-so at best. Though we all have it, young and elder, able bodied and not so able. It is the Human condition. For some of us it is the sex act itself that drives us. For some of us it is the stimulation of the hunt. For some of us it is the seduction, for some it is the caring for another person, for some it is the longing to be appreciatedloved, for some it is the entire romance thing. These desires and yearnings can be so strong they rise above the taboos the world has erected against extra-marital affairs. For lots of individuals the yearnings will overcome their doubts and make them risk the rage of not only their relatives, but society also. So why, what is the mechanism?
Sex Addicts, probably some of us are. Sex is very pleasant, better then drugs, a natural high. If you are in this group of biologically motivated sex addicts and can find away to have sex and not hurt your relatives or anybody else? You will need to lessen the threat you are taking. If you have the attitude that a good affair is one that is beneficial to all, then good luck.
No love at home, or no romance. I think this is the largest cluster, huge actually. There are many couples whose marriage is over, but they are happy in the manner they live, and upsetting the extended families is not on their list of things they wish to do. You love your other half but there is no romance. Then there are the kids to look after. Your funds are so tangled. You need the medical insurance, and so on. There are a lot of reasons to be together besides love and sex.
Physical reasons, there are some people who can not have sex. They have physical reasons that prevent them completing the sex act, at least not with their othere half. An marital affair at times solves the difficulty while keeping the marriage undamaged.
Ignoring, sorrowfully this is a frequent reason I fear. One or the other, usually the man is sexually neglecting his lady for a tones of reasons. As a man I actually appreciate you guys neglecting your girls and making them obtainable to us men of romance, making them “hot milfs” But I still think it is despicable that you are neglectful. Also there is the spouse who is neglectful until the wife or husband has an affair, then they condemn them for doing so, when they where the catalyst. Those who neglect, then condemn, are not just neglectful, but malevolent.
Something is just missing in the marriage, I can not put my finger on it, but its not there. Perhaps its romance that is missing, maybe it is a lack of love, maybe compassion is disappeared, could be it is the intimacy, maybe neglect. Maybe we have simply grown apart, our ordinary interests diverged. Could be it is that what I want, and what I want to do the rest of my life, is conflicting of what you want. Maybe I simply don’t know what I want from the marriage anymore. Maybe, just maybe I miss that sensation that when I am with you, it just feels right.
The ultimate reason people give is, they search for the excitement that is missing and so very much longed for.
There are other reasons, the feeling of power, to run off, for economic gain, for vengeance and so on. I am sure there are more reasons why people have affairs then these. I only stop because if this gets too long no one will read it.
Tags: affairs, Dating, dating married people, extramarital affairs, Marriage, married dating, seeking an affair